Changes are coming...Part 3

For those who have stuck it out-I thank you.  I know this was an extra-long update, but I hope it has been worth it for you.  Again, if you’ve NOT read Changes are coming…Part 1 or Part 2; please read them BEFORE you read this last update.  Changes are Coming…Part 1 & Changes are Coming…Part 2 can be found in my “OLDER POSTS” at the lower right hand of this page

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 After we returned home Tuesday eve from Stanford, I received an email letting me know new test results were ready to view on my health page.  The surprising thing is that the results for the echo came back with my ejection fraction reading at 55%. It was 35-40% in July, after my life-altering heart cath/echo.  Ejection fraction is a measurement of the percentage of blood leaving your heart each time it contracts. The lower the percentage, the less blood going to the rest of your body. 55%-75% is in the normal range.  Interesting….I thought, as theoretically it should progressively be decreasing.  

As the week wore on, instead of feeling more fatigued, I was feeling better.  The cough was just about non-existent.  I was able to remain upright (and out of my bed lounging) for a majority of Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.  The Saturday before Easter, I spent preparing a time consuming dessert in the morning, then going with the family to a golf lesson for the kids, then home again to complete the dessert for Easter Sunday.  We had a few last minute things to accomplish Easter eve, before morning arose.  We got up very early Sunday morning-the kids were too excited to sleep.  Easter baskets were discovered, we had breakfast & headed off to church services-where I was able to stand for ALL the worships songs.  (I hadn’t been capable of this for the last 2 months.  I usually remained seated for most of our worship songs-as I could not stand for that long of a period of time without feeling woozy or tired.)

We returned home and had an Easter egg hunt and then prepared for our company to arrive by 1:00.  Again-no lounging in bed for me after 6:30 a.m. Our family came and though I hung out sitting down in the living room most of the visit, it was more for the fact that I was being chastised for trying to help out, not because I felt the need.

On the Monday after Easter, I received a call to schedule my annual appointment and was told I would come one day for clinic, a stress echo, chest x-ray and labs, and the following day I’d have a heart cath.  I said, “A heart cath?  I was told by Dr. Hunt a heart cath wouldn’t be necessary.”  The nurse told me it was in the orders, but she would call & verify before scheduling the times for the appointments.  Later that afternoon she called back and said, yes…in fact they did want a heart cath!

On Tuesday, I drove myself to bible study.  Let me step back a moment here and tell you that I’ve only driven 3 times since August.  Once to a doctor appoint in Cameron Park which basically made me decide to stop driving as the symptoms were a bit crazy and I was afraid I would pass out.  I’d passed out a couple times at school before my first transplant and I didn’t want that to happen while I was driving and injure someone else.  In October I did drive to the Firehouse Pumpkin Pancake breakfast that was less than 3 miles from our house…and felt fine, but in December I drove myself to bible study and though everything turned out fine, let’s just say, I probably should not have been driving.

So here it is the, Tuesday after Easter, and I wanted to drive myself to bible study and was feeling pretty good & had been since March 17^th.  I cannot sufficiently explain to you what a sense of freedom I felt behind the wheel other than to tell you it was like driving a car for the first time by yourself without your parent’s supervision…such independence!  I turned on the radio as I was leaving our house and wouldn’t you know…a song had just ended and the next song was “Tell Your Heart to Beat Again”, by Danny Gokey.  I can’t make this stuff up people!  If this isn’t God talking to me…seriously!

It’s now been 3 weeks since my healing prayers and I can say that the symptoms I described on the first night of this update are practically non-existent.  As I bustled around the house preparing to host Easter dinner for 10 people-I got a little short of breath-that’s it. The last time my heart was going completely crazy was during the EKG at Stanford, but not for the echo the next morning.  My body hasn’t felt physically exhausted in over a 2 weeks!  I feel like things are moving backwards for me, to a time when I was less short of breath (only during exertion), no heart symptoms (except when excited or nervous), and a bit more energy (to live the daily life of a wife, mom, sister, daughter and friend). 

I know it will seem incredible.  I know it will seem impossible. Believe me when I tell you, had this occurred to me prior to 2011 I would have chalked it up to MY OWN will to live and MY OWN body’s internal power.  That’s how and what I believed all my life through the stories my mom told me of surviving the spinal meningitis when I was 8 months old.  Through the crazy mistakes of the medical team during my open heart surgery when I was 11, then again during my back surgery at 14.  And even during the heart transplant-in which the timing of certain things to have happened can only be divine providence.  And still-I took the credit as being a survivor and conceded credit to the transplant pioneers and innovation of the medical professionals. 

I can hardly believe the grace that has been given to me by God.  I don’t need my heart to be the same as the day I received my first transplant 25+ years ago-though I know He can do that.  My only desire is to be healthy enough to be able to prepare dinner for my family.  To sit at the kitchen table or in our soon-to-be craft/school room with the kids doing school, and read entire books to them without being winded.  Perhaps go on the occasional nature walk around the property, or tide-pooling and walking along the coastline while camping and travelling. I don’t want to run a marathon or train for the Tour de France.  (I don’t even want to ride a bike!  Sorry Scott).  I would like to have a Tahoe weekend with my girlfriends without feeling like an elephant is sitting on my chest. I’d like to take that trip to Italy I missed this fall with my sister, even if it has to be a cruise rather than a walking tour. 

I just want a little more time-not time as in days, weeks or years that can be quantified, though I know that is what God is granting me.   I want a bit more quality time with my family, my friends and I think that is what the Lord Jesus has gifted me.  I think that is all He really wants for us.  Quality time with Him and those we love.  And I for one am going to accept His gift.

I’ll keep everyone posted in early June as I celebrate 26 years with Eli’s heart and I’ll have official news from Stanford’s tests as a window to see what’s happening inside.

And in the meantime…my parting gift to you this beautiful “April showers bring May flowers” spring day.  A song that I’ve shared before for those who’ve been around long enough to see one of my photo story projects honoring my donor Eli.   Turn up the volume-these lyrics are set to the music!